101
At the Flood-Ride of Popularity
Court Officer (to Queen Victoria)- "There is an Hamerican gent houtside as what wants to see Your Majesty."
The Queen- "It's Mr. Phelps, I suppose. Tell him I've gone over to the tower to see if the Kohlnoor is all right."
Court Officer-"It's not Mr. Phelps; it's Buffalo Bill."
The Queen- "Oh, show him in at once."
102
BUFFALO BILL never allows a performance of the "Wild West" to close without the band playing either the "Star Spangled Banner" or "Yankee Doodle." Bill is from the Great West, where people are patriotic and are not ashamed to have people know it. Buffalo Bill is a hundred times more of an honest American citizen than the eye-glass dudes who ape foreign ways.
103
A British Disguise.
The London Court Journal furnishes this veracious biography of Buffalo Bill: "Hon. W. F. Cody (Buffalo Bill) was a close companion of a man named Boone, who discovered Kentucky in 1869. Mr. Cody married a grand-daughter of a distinguished gentleman known as Sitting Bull frog. Cody was twice Governor of Chicago and was at one time Mayor of the Arkansaw Legislature. He served in the Confederate army, in the command of Gen. Butler, who so gallantly defended New Orleans against the threatened invasion of the Federal General Longstreet. After the war Mr. Cody went to Congress from the province of Detroit and introduced a measure for the relief of the citizens of Buffalo, which gained for him the name of Buffalo Bill. He has contributed largely to the Atlantic Monthly, a newspaper edited by Mark Twain and Uncle Tom Cabin, a man who is mainly noted for his negro dialect sketches. Mr. Cody has a ranch of many acres in St. Louis, where he keeps a large lot of Indians and ponies constantly on hand."
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Little Celebrations.
TRACY, Minn., July 4. - The feature of the day was a pony running race. Bucksking won.
MOORHEAD, July 4. -- Moorhead held a fine celebration. The procession was nearly a mile long. The foundry and the News office had floats with men at work.
BRAINERD, July 4. -- Rain interfered with the out-door program. There was, however, a very respectable parade and an address by Judge Sleeper. IN the evening a dinner and a dance.
BISMARCK, July 4. -- The day was passed off quietly here. The chief attraction was at the grounds of the Bismark Gun club, where several hotly contested matches were shot off, Bismarck winning over Jamestown. George Feigler, probably the best shot in America, broke twelve successive balls thrown while riding in a wagon at full speed, and broke three balls thrown into the air at the same time. Tonight the city is ablaze with fireworks.
WABASHA, July 4. -- The celebration today was the largest ever held in the city. The parade was a very striking feature. Every business industry in the city was represented and the G. A. R. post, three bands and a large number of invincibles were in line. The exercises consisted of chorus music, reading the Declaration of Independence and an oration. Wabasha beat Lake City at baseball 15 to 7.
LONDON, July 4. -- The Fourth of July was celebrated with more than usual fidelity by American resident in the leading European cities. Minister Phelps' reception was largely attended by Americans in London and was the most successful affair of the kind on record. Ex-Minister James Russell Lowell, J. G. Blaine and family, Mrs. James Brown Potter, Minnie Hauk, Buffalo Bill Cody, and General Palfrey, of Boston, were among the notables present.
105
SHREDS AND PATCHES
Neck or nothing - A society bud - Life.
Brown -- "Hello, Jones! How's your wife?" Jones (a little deaf) -- "Very blustering and disagreeable this morning." -- Troy Times.
It is used as an argument, either for temperance or the bicycle, that no bicycle rider ever comes home drunk on his bicycle. -- Plaoyune.
Beer drinkers will be pleased to know that "a schooner to be bigger than any now known" is in progress of construction at Camden. -- Boston Commercial Bulletin.
A vocal authority declares that singers should have ten hours sleepy daily. As far as a great many of them are concerned, that time should include the evenings. -- Philadelphia North American.
It is all very well to begin with "two souls with but a single thought, two hearts that beat as one." Care should be taken that the two hears not soon detected in beating each other. -- Boston Post.
A retailer of one of the popular "spring" waters was seen filling his tank from a private well not a thousand miles from Somerville the other day. Things are not always what they seem. -- Boston Journal.
With or Without: Literary lodger (to new servant) - "Oh, you are the new servant, and what might your name be?" "Anner, sir." Literary lodger -- "Hannah or Anna?" Servant -- "Tain't neither, sir; its Anner, with two haltches." - Fun.
Scientist - "The planetary indications give assurance that there will be no rain for the next three days." Man with a bunion (smiling with a lofty superiority) - "There will be rain, sir, in less than twelve hours." And there was. -- Boston Beacon.